What’s in it for me?

The “what’s in it for me?” mindset brings to mind that person who will never do anything unless they benefit. If you would ask them to volunteer for a project, they would give you a flat out “No” unless they could find a “what’s in it for me?” angle that would really benefit them. I remember an individual who was a high power insurance salesperson. He joined organizations and rapidly applied his skill sets to position himself into the best possible place to connect with the most people.

He was highly skilled in building what seemed like relationships and was very attentive in his listening skill as long as the “what’s in it for me?’ side of him was getting payback. However, he either found fault with you or dropped you like a hot potato if you didn’t turn into his newest customer. If you got in his way, look out.

The What’s in it for me? perspective will in the short-run get you to your goals because most people who are operating from the What’s in it for me? mindset are driven and generally successful. However, the What’s in it for me? angle only works until the people around you figure it out. Then you will need to move on to a new group, organization, or company.

How can I help you?

At first glance, especially after reading the What’s in it for me? discussion above, how can I help you? sounds like the best way to be. And in most cases, it is. But like with most things, it can be taken too far. The How can I help you? person is the one you can count on to be there when you need them. They are America’s volunteer force and in companies, they are the ones taking on extra work, staying late to make sure the job gets done, and being the helpful person everywhere they go.

Sounds good, right? What’s the downside then? The How can I help you? person is often working so hard to help that they never ask what’s in it for me? It is easy for them to get steamrollered by people who recognize them as the one who will do the work. And they can easily lose out on the income side too because they never showcase anything they do. When they look back on a career or volunteer past, they don’t even generally see any accomplishments.

Where’s the middle ground?

While I believe firmly in the How can I help you? mindset as critical to the future, they need a small dose of What’s in it for me? The What’s in it for me? mindset focuses too heavily on income-producing strategies often destroying people in their path. But the How can I help you? mindset can sometimes be scammed by the first person who recognizes that they are easy to manipulate.

If you take time to check where you are on this continuum regularly and try to find the balance point, you will be more successful than if you swing too hard one way or the other.

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Photo Credit

Photo by evilerin

People who know me will find this to be a hilarious topic. Start with Balance is post # 3 in my You have to START to finish series. Balance is one of the things I hear everyone talking about these days and I am about as out of whack as they come with the topic of balance.

I had planned this as part of this series but couldn’t help but hear Jim Connolly speaking to me when I read his post this morning, Have you been working this week? Jim also mentions Danny Brown’s post, the Danger of Not Work which also discusses this issue. Both of them talk about how when work isn’t “work” to us, we run the risk of never quitting.

Jim says this:

If like most business owners you LOVE what you do, always be aware of the need for balance.  Paradoxically, by working a little less, you often find that you achieve a little more.

and Danny says this:

When we’re passionate about something, we never see it as something we have to do – we see it as something we want to do. But how long does it take for our not work leading to everything else not working?

Both fit me well and have even before the solo focus on Design Resumes this year. I can remember way back, probably around 2003 or 2004 when one of my very good friends e-mailed me these words and told me to put them on my computer:

Take time for yourself — every day!

I put them on a post-it and left it there for a few years. My friend struggled and still struggles with the same problem himself, so in reminding me, he was reminding himself.

But I do love what I do, I love working with my clients, I love blogging, I love social networking and writing in general so none of it is work for me. However, I do know that I can’t be creative all the time and the well does run dry. So I break up my days, doing house projects sometimes and on days when I am running out of steam, I take a nap.

In the summer months, I tend to be outside much more. Wisconsin doesn’t lend itself to play much, for me, anyway since I don’t ski or snowmobile. In the spring, summer, and fall, I walk and work in my yard or even just move to the deck.

I wrote about the job seeker perspective in All Work and No Play, Or earlier. The same concept applies to anyone, job seeker, career changer, entrepreneur, or happily employed and not moving. We all need to look at the issue of balance.

Since I am still working on the  balance concept, here’s a few of my concessions:

1. I’ve started reading fiction again. Not deep fiction, just light fiction that makes me relax. I finish a book every few days. Delving into someone else’s world gives me a different perspective and I love to read. Before I was only allowing me to read books related to marketing or the career industry and so I was getting to the point it wasn’t relaxing to read anymore… it was work! Now the novels entertain me and often teach me at the same time.
2. I go to bed much earlier these days. Before I stayed up until 10pm or so most nights but sometimes the last three hours were just me sitting watching TV mindlessly and waiting for the magic hour. Now if I wake up sleepless, I pick up my book and read again until I am tired and my average sleep is more than 7 hours most nights as opposed to 5 to 6 hours.
3. I break away to go cook something. Again something I love and it serves a duel purpose — I enjoy being creative in the kitchen and I and whoever else is around gets fed.
4. Periodically, I meet a friend for coffee or lunch and just leave for a couple hours. Since I don’t have a car right now, I really am at home (which is also where work is) most of the time and so getting out just for a bit helps.

Notice that none of the points above cost anything except #4 costs any money and even #4 can be under $20 easily (if you opt for lunch instead of coffee). For job seekers watching a budget, there’s a few options to break up your day.

I suspect balance will always be a challenge for me, but in 2011, I will give more thought to finding more. Stay tuned to my next thoughts on Start with… my series on You have to Start to finish!

Photo by herval

#3 in the What’s Holding You Back series — designed to help you think about why you are not moving forward in your job search, career, or life.

Someone who works really hard should be an asset to an employer, right? Why would being a workaholic hold you back?

We are meant to have more than work in our lives. Now I love my work, I love helping people move forward in their careers and I love technology. I love learning but I confess that even though I have been self-employed for over 20 years, I am pretty much a workaholic.

What does that mean in relationship to success in your career? We all need to have perspective in our lives too. When you focus on one thing too much, it closes the door to what is all around you. Though I said I love learning, I find that I am often doing most of my learning on the computer and not in the large library of books that I have.

I love reading everything, but I put reading fiction and even non-fiction on the back burner because I am busy and a myriad of other things like gardening, yardwork, fitness, and more. When you adapt a workaholic methodology, you focus so hard on the tasks or projects at hand that you tend to ignore the things that add to the value of your life.

If you work in an office setting, working long hours may seem like the only way to get ahead but it can rob you of the influences of other people and networking opportunities or just relaxation. Balance is a funny word because when you are happy doing whatever it is you do, you don’t feel like you are working. But balance means integrating other aspects besides whatever is work to you into your life.

Not taking a vacation at all, banking your vacation hours sounds like a dedicated employee but in reality, it robs you and your company of the opportunity to step back and let your brain focus on other things.

Determine what things are important to you and make sure that you do some of them every day — besides work. If you like walking, running, skiing, swimming… go do it… If you like cooking or gardening, fit it into your life.

We aren’t meant to be robots. Think about it… I promise to work on not being a workaholic too!

Teddy

Fortunately, I have Teddy, the German Shepherd, to put his paw on my leg and say, Mom, I want You to go outside with me!

At this moment, life slowed down a bit. Oh, I have a to-do list as always, even some items that really need priority but today, I have been in an appreciation mode.

I had a great talk with a Design Resumes client this morning about the jobs he likes and the jobs he doesn’t. He’s very employed and very much in demand but is just in a reflective mode of wanting to look at alternatives.

He told me there are things he knows he can do well but he doesn’t like doing them. I told him he should pay attention to that feeling because though we all have to do things we don’t like sometimes, if that is the essence of a job, we will end up frustrated and probably overwhelmed.

I find myself listening to the advice I give others and finding it resonating with me. It is time to take time, to appreciate, to stop running to play catch-up, to stop to smell the roses, appreciate the sunsets, read a good book, and enjoy a good fire.

Time to slow down, to regain balance, so that the “me” is refreshed and ready for the next challenge. This is hard for me to do and I think hard for many people to do. But if you find that “overwhelmed” is your word too, maybe you need to look for that balance with me so that your career becomes manageable instead of it managing you.

Talk to me, I talk back

Stuck in your job search or just ready to move on or up from your existing position? Julie Walraven, a professional resume writer and career marketing strategist, can help you write your resume and teach you how to find a new job. To find out how, Click here!