What I wanted for my Birthday

Though I have many people who read this blog regularly, here is something I usually don’t talk about. My husband Bill’s job changed in 2005 or 2006 from a full-time remodeling contractor to a full time caregiver when his parents started having some health issues.

A little history

His dad had heart surgery and his mom had a form of cancer with signs of aging. He was asked, as the only child in the area, to provide care. We were only too happy to let him and as time went on, it became a lightly paid position. At one point, he even stayed overnight.

Bill’s mom died in 2008 but Bill’s dad continued to need his help. So now Bill works for his dad who just turned 90 and generally leaves our house around 7 or 8am and returns around 7 or 8am. It isn’t the typical caregiver role, because in addition to helping his dad, Bob, with household things, driving him on errands, and going shopping for him, Bill also manages and works on Bob’s projects. Bob just bought 20 residential lots that will be marketed and resold but there are many other things from brushing and sprucing up the lots to meetings with engineers, excavators, and municipal government that Bill works on for his dad.

A new journey

For me, this journey left me alone a lot. In the beginning with more than 25 years of marriage under my belt, I didn’t mind having some alone time. Marriage is always challenging and a little space can be very good.

But lately, I have been thinking that all I want is time with Bill to get our household things done and make life a little more organized and easier here. We have been on a 20 year remodeling journey on this house and I am anxious to move to the next phase of getting the kitchen done and then there will be siding and you know, the long list of things that a house will always need. You remodel one end and when you get all the initial projects done, it is time to start over. At least that’s the way it works here.

what I wanted for my birthday

So what I wanted for my birthday was not a present, not dinner out, not a trip, or a vacation. I wanted a little more time with Bill on a regular basis starting with the Saturday before my birthday. I was delighted to see him come home at 3pm instead of 7pm. The first thing we did was take a nap… since we get up between 5am and 5:30am most days. Then we vacuumed. And I was delighted to have help moving furniture. We had to fix the vacuum again but at least I had help.

That’s what I wanted for my birthday! Strange as it may seem, being able to get projects done, even simple home care, delights me! So there you have it… something else you never knew about Julie!

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